Category: Writers Block
With ALL, which I DEFINITELY DON'T REGRET, of the various CONTROVERSIAL BOARD-POSTINGS that I have out here, I CERTAINLY RECOGNIZE that there DEFINITELY would need to be a post that SPEAKS the VERY ESSENCE of my heart. THIS, of course, is ABSOLUTELY the VERY REALIZATION that I, MYSELF, am a HOPELESS SINNER, in need of the ONE AND ONLY SAVIOR, JESUS, who took the VERY PLACE that I, and I, ALONE, should've died, for the VERY SINS that I would TOO FREQUENTLY REPEAT, CONSTANTLY, and for the MOST PART, with NO REPENTENCE, which I'm DEFINITELY NOT PROUD OF, which I'm VERY SURE that I'm NOT the only one with this issue, and JUST MAYBE, THIS POST could serve as a SUPPORT AREA for ANY/ALL of us that CONSTANTLY struggle with the "TOTAL-SURRENDERING" process, which, I believe, begins, and is DEFINITELY LIFE-LONG PREFACED WITH, TOTAL OBEDIENCE to God, WITHOUT COMPROMISE, ETC., which is a commitment that, is DEEP, HEART-DESIRED, but AT-TIMES-EXTREMELY CHALLENGING, due to the VERY CARNAL NATURE that I, for example, have UNFORTUNATELY allowed myself to be TOTALLY ENSLAVED by.
LET'S FACE IT: I, DEFINITELY, wanna have my OWN way, wanna ONLY do what I want, and the VERY LAST THING, if it's EVEN on the list, that I'd EVER wanna do, WOULD be to give ALL of my TOTAL WILL to be TOTALLY DIRECTED, PERHAPS, to areas of MY life that I just ABSOLUTELY REFUSE to DARE to even DREAM of, and that for ANYONE, INCLUDING GOD, HIMSELF, to ACTUALLY TAKE the VERY POWER of my OWN CONTROL is DEFINITE GROUNDS for TOTAL WAR.
Now, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't EVER think that I would TOTALLY SUPPORT the above, because as I'm CURRENTLY thinking out ALL of what I'm writing, I DO BELIEVE, which I'm HOPING that I'm correct, that God's UNMERRITTED, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE is just POURING OUT ALL OVER ME, as I GLADLY extend this SAME ABUNDANCE of His Love to ANY/ALL OF YOU that are reading this message.
FIRST AND FOREMOST, as I remind MYSELF, in informing/reminding YOU, the VERY WAR that we ARE involved with, is between OUR FLESH and GOD'S SPIRIT, which DEFINITELY goes, COMPLETELY WITHOUT SAYING; although I don't know how the ACTUALLY RECITATION of the 12-step program goes, WORD-FOR-WORD, WE could IMPROVIZE, with GOD'S leading, our OWN "STEPS" program, which would ALWAYS be an ENTIRELY CHANGED LIFE, that's TOTALLY DISCIPLINE-CONTROLLED, and DISCIPLINE, as far as I'M concerned, is the VERY AREA, for ME, that I JUST SO HAPPEN to FINALLY RECOGNIZE that I'm in GREAT NEED of, REGARDLESS of my unfortunate rebellious nature.
THE VERY ABSOLUTE SOURCE of GOD'S LOVE, UNMERRITTED, as I earlier mentioned, is SO REAL, SO TRUE, SO POWERFUL, SO MYSTERIOUS, etc., which PROBABLY might bring to question what THAT might have to do with the VERY REALITY of OUR STRUGGLE and CONSTANT FAILURE to live a NON-CARNAL LIFE, and NOT JUST SURVIVE AN EXISTANCE. What it DOES have to do with it is that WE, VULNERABLE as we are, are DEFINITELY SUSEPTIBLE to ANY/ALL of life's screw-ups, ESPECIALLY when there are those of us that come from VARIOUS BACKGROUNDS that stem from ANY/ALL WALKS OF LIFE that would be equated with that of "THE PRODIGAL SON," since EVERYONE OF US are EXACTLY THAT--PRODIGALS, who, EVEN THOUGH we've been CREATED in the VERY IMAGE of our LOVING CREATOR, have STILL wandered off. THAT REMINDS ME of when I was growing up, I've gone to day camps, and EVEN when I went to my VERY FIRST sleep-away camp (CAMP WAPANACKI), how there were times that I would just wander off from whatever designated group that I might've been assigned to, SIMPLY BECAUSE I wanted to just "SPREAD MY WINGS," so to speak, to explore areas that the GROUP, ESPECIALLY the group LEADER, whose focus was TOTALLY DIFFERENT, JUST DID, nor WOULD NOT GO, that NOT ONLY have I DARED to, but have ACTUALLY GONE, regardless of ANY POSSIBLE REPRIMAND that I HAVE received, which I STILL repeated such offense, either a short time LATER, or WHENEVER, but NEVER too MUCH long after. I'm VERY sure that SUCH CASE is STILL the same, when applied in our WALK, if there's EVEN such, with the Lord, whenever SECULAR INTERESTS seem to lure us away, as WE, POWERLESS that we've ALLOWED OURSELVES TO BE, aimlessly wander about, seeking fulfillment that ONLY HE, NOT ANY
OTHER SOURCE, can secure.
Now, let's get ONE THING STRAIGHT: I am DEFINITELY NO PREACHER, NOR AM I, as true as this is, ANY CHRIST-LIKE ROLE-MODEL (QUITE UNFORTUNATELY), so for those that are DEFINITELY STRONGER THAN I am, but DEFINITELY HOPE to be JUST AS STRONG, PLEASE PRAY that the Lord would just EVER SO LOVINGLY, as I DEFINITELY KNOW that He CAN, and that He WILL, be the VERY LIGHT that I, HOPEFULLY, will allow MYSELF to be drawn BY, as well as TO, but what I hope that DOES come of THIS topic, is the VERY SUPPORTIVE FEEDBACK that would empower ALL OF US to WANT to live the VERY CHRIST-LIKE "QUALITY OF LIFE" that would be TOTALLY INFLUENTIAL to OTHERS, that would HOPEFULLY be drawn, as well.